TCWF the Toxic Custard Guide to Life in the Office

The Photocopier

Photocopiers. Another example of a good idea, implemented by complete sadists. I mean honestly... does it really need to have that many buttons? And do they have to have all those little symbols all over them? Surely it would be easier if each button just actually SAID what it was for. "Do the copy now", rather than just being big, blank, and green.

And the thing about the photocopier is that everyone barely knows how to use it, because whoever originally took delivery of the photocopier lost the manual in a desk drawer somewhere. Without first making a copy of it.

The bigger the photocopier, the more things seem to go wrong with it. Out of toner, out of paper, paper jam, toner jam, hand jammed in the input tray... In fact, the piece of paper you most frequently see at the photocopier is the hand-scrawled "Out of Order" sign.

Photocopiers have a lot in common with laser printers. Quite apart from the similar technology, it's the paper jamming and demands for more toner are dead give-aways. And the way that people always seem to be queuing around them both.

Why is it most office appliances are a sort of greyish beige? And stereos and all other recreational appliances are black? It's probably so management can instantly spot which minions have brought in personal stereos to run off the company's electricity while pretending to work. What someone needs to do is make personal stereos that are beige. ("Ah -- using some of the new equipment, eh Smith? What exactly is this? Oh, an audio monitoring refractor unit. Hmm, well done, keep up the good work.")


Toxic Custard Workshop Files Guide To Life In The Office