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JEFF: So, the first Tuesday in November's gone past again, eh? How did you do?
RON: Well, I didn't get caught in the rain.
JEFF: No no, I mean The Cup.
RON: Ah, I see. Well, I didn't realise there was quite that much in the Coke bottle. So when I poured it into the cup it kinda got right to the top - you know when it goes right up to the edges, and a little bit further, but doesn't quite overflow...
JEFF: No no no, I'm talking about the Melbourne Cup. It was last Tuesday. "The race that stops a nation."
RON: Does it? Which nation?
JEFF: Australia. And well no, not really, but that's what they say about it. It doesn't necessarily mean that it actually does, it's just a way of making it sound like a mega event, that's all... So, did you have a flutter?
RON: I thought it was horses, not butterflies.
JEFF: Yes well, that may well be the case. You might be right in thinking that for 130 odd years they've met at Flemington Racecourse to see twenty-four horses run over two miles for a first prize of two million dollars. Horses, rather than Lepidoptera. You might be right. Did you happen to bet on any of these horses?
RON: Yeah. I put money of them, yeah. I put two dollars to win on each one. Because I read somewhere that one of the twenty-four would win.
JEFF: Well, that's probably pretty safe. One of them's almost bound to win. Didn't you bet on any both ways?
RON: Now look... I've got nothing against that sort of thing. It's perfectly all right between consecutive adults, in privates. But personally, I am not a bilingual. It's just not for me.
JEFF: Umm... right. So did you bet on any of the other races that day?
RON: Yeah. I managed to get a bet that Phar Lap would get a place in the last race. 100,000,000 to one.
JEFF: Phar Lap? You know Phar Lap's dead, don't you? In the museum, stuffed like a teddy-bear?
RON: Oh yeah, that's why the odds were so good. At 100,000,000 to one, a bet of one dollar would have made... ummm... errr... Tell you what, it's just a shame that the plan didn't work.
JEFF: What plan?
RON: Two of my mates were going to break into the museum on Monday night, take Phar Lap out on a couple of skateboards, wheel him along to Flemington for the race... and Bob's you're uncle, instant fortune.
9: Ants
